|Jumbo Dammit Jr.|
Subject: i hate Earl Dammit 3rd|
thank you for my new eazy bake oven. my brother Earl Dammit the turd (sic)continually takes dumps in my new eazy bake oven, and then seals the oven door with epoxy. he thinks hes a comedian, I think hes insane.please don't bring him no more presents (beartraps, etc)until he cleans up my eazy bake oven. if you have the time, please strangle him with one of Ma's old diapers. Dad says Earl will outgrow this and that it is only a passing phase, but Dad was taking a dump on the utility room floor while he was telling me this, so, as you can see, his opinion is worthless.